Getting on the Roller Coaster


This picture really says it all. For those of you that don’t know, I was married, separated, and divorced in less then a year. This post (and all of Vol. 1) isn’t about bad mouthing my Ex, even though there are some things that I know are the truth and could put her in a bad light. She gave me my son, and for that I will ever be grateful. She has also given me heartache and grief.

I don’t want to say that marrying Nikki was a mistake, because in essence, it wasn’t a mistake. It was a speed bump, a learning experience, a roller coaster of emotions. But like I said before, I wouldn’t call it a mistake.

I want to make this very clear, because I don’t want any of you to misconstrue the meaning behind this. I, in no way, miss my ex-wife. I do not want to get back with her, or would I ever want that. This is just the beginning of my story, and I want you all to have some context/laughs at how stupid and ignorant I was back then.

Nikki and I had met in high school, and even back then, something had caught my eye about her. She was athletic, and I was naturally drawn to girls who were athletes, because I was an athlete myself. We were friends, and I became friends with her brothers and sisters. It wasn’t until college that our “relationship” changed.

I was dating someone else at the time Nikki came back into my life. I was told, “that I couldn’t be friends with her (Nikki) anymore, because that’s just not what guys in relationships do.” I was at college, Lock Haven University, not really studying anything, because all I really wanted to do was play baseball.

I was a good baseball player in high school, and thought “I don’t really want to do anything else other then play sports, so why not try my hand at playing in college.” It was a good and a bad decision for me. I went to college, not knowing what I wanted to do, or not really caring about anything I wanted to do, other then playing baseball. I had an okay freshman year. I had a decent sophomore year, but it wasn’t until junior year that I broke out a little bit.

After the baseball season was over, I didn’t really want to continue with school. It was also around this time, Nikki randomly text me, about how she missed me; how she was about to get married and all she could think about was me. After offering her, some honest, just friends advice, she broke off her engagement. Never in my wildest dreams did I see that happening. 

Little did I know then, that this was the first upward hill of this roller coaster ride called my life. Anyone who has ridden a roller coaster knows what happens after you go up the first hill; you go down, stomach in your throat, no turning back or jumping off until the ride is over, and the ride attendant says “keep all hands and feet inside the car until the ride comes to a complete stop.” How was I suppose to know that this roller coaster ride would be 2 years long?

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